If you’re reading this, it’s ok for you to be here.
And by here, I don’t necessarily mean here, as in the Earth, although that is true too. I mean anywhere that you are: a packed classroom, the first conversation with a mutual friend, a party, an awkward dinner with your parents, a competitive job interview. It’s ok for you to be there and nobody has the right to make you feel otherwise, including yourself.
Over the course of my nearly twenty-one years of existence, I’ve spent far too much of my time wondering if it was ok for me to live my life. I wondered if it was ok for me to be at a get-together with people that I didn’t know. I wondered if it was ok for me to strive for a career that other people wanted. And I wondered if it was ok for me to enjoy the things that I enjoyed. Most of the time, when this doubt would infiltrate my head, I’d quietly answer something along the lines of
“Probably not”
“I don’t think so”
“Nobody said that this was ok, so it must not be”
Frequently, when faced with these situations, I’d flee. I’d go home, seek refuge in my room, or take a trip to the bathroom to avoid a confrontation. It seemed to me that no matter what I did, it was not what others expected of me. So, rather than addressing this debilitating self-questioning, I succumbed to it and missed out on many great experiences and opportunities.
I’m writing this letter now to let whoever is reading this know that you belong wherever you are, no matter the circumstances. Whether you want to be somewhere or would rather never be somewhere, you are still entitled to simply be wherever it is that you are. Your presence is not a burden, and your needs and feelings are valid. No matter how out of place you feel, you’re always entitled to existence. I hope that you can learn to turn that uncomfortable feeling into inspiration. When you feel unwanted and want to hide, stay, talk to someone, and see just how welcoming people can be. You might be surprised because I surely was.
It takes a little bit of time and practice, but if you set your mind to it, you’ll feel right at home anywhere. Because after all, it’s more than ok for you to be here; everyone wants you to be here.
Aidan M., University of Michigan Class of 2023
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