If you're reading this, “you are enough, you are so enough, it is unbelievable how enough you are.”
I came across this quote on my Instagram one day, and ever since then, it has stuck with me.
Anxiety is something that I have struggled with ever since high school, and honestly, I probably struggled before that. There was a time between my freshman and junior year when I had a hard time stepping out of my comfort zone. While all I ever wanted was to feel like I belong, I walked around daily with this built-up fear inside me that I was going to get judged. The people that I had known and loved, slowly began to disintegrate from my life as I became overwhelmed with the pressures of high school.
I remember feeling completely alone as the friends I thought I had stood to the side and watched me get bullied. The panic attacks I would experience occurred weekly, and I spent most weekends alone in my room. My confidence was shattered, but after therapy sessions and a start on my anxiety medicine, I finally got to a point in my life where I had gotten control of the triggers of my anxiety and focused on changing my mindset. By the time senior year rolled around I was so ready for college to start.
Flash forward to Fall 2019. I had just come off of a high after the best freshman year ever when all of a sudden all the progress I had made in myself was thrown out the window in a single evening. I was told by a close family member that “I should never have been born,” for reasons that are still unknown to me to this day. That shook me to my core in ways I didn’t expect.
I slowly began to question every relationship I had. If my own family member didn’t see value in me, then why would any of the friends I made? Or some guy I was interested in? The anxiety attacks I was once able to suppress turned into a daily reoccurrence because I thought that I didn’t matter. I figured that every new relationship I would make would eventually result in them leaving me, just like everyone in my past had once done. I got to a point where I would even thank my friends for hanging out with me because I felt like a burden. I felt alone, even though I wasn’t.
I never understood why certain things like that happen to me, but if there is one thing I learned through all of this is that I should never question my worth. Through all my ups and downs I have grown to treat myself with kindness more than ever before, because while at even your lowest it might not seem like it, but you are loved.
If you’re reading this you are important. You are enough.
Kiera K, Villanova University ‘22
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